jane_and.the_dragon

 
הצטרף: 15/04/2014
Worry about your character, not your reputation. Your character is who you are, your reputation is who people think you are. ht
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לפני 1 שנה 38 ימים

IDIOTS ON THE NET

       It never seaces to amaze me how many idiots there are runing around on the net.   Lets take the one that has been e stalking me for a few months.   He showed up on a different id last night.   I now this idiot has been reading my blog so I hope he likes this one cause it is gonna be all about him sense he so despratly wants my attention.   As anyone that really knows me, knows I am in a few on line pool leagues and those that really know me know I use different ids and names on every id I own.   This is not secret.   What is really amazing to me is the amount of idiots I have following me around trying to make sure everyone on the net knows all my ids. lol It is so rediclous.   I know I have a boring life that is why I amuse myself with on line games.   The truely facinating thing is those that have such sad lonely lives that they have to follow me around to on line games so they can make idiots of them selves in the lobbys of the games.   lol    I mean really how pothetic does your life need to be to follow someone around on the net looking for all their different screan names just so you can go OH LOOK THERE IS JANE ON THAT ID.   Rotflmao.
There was a time when people doing that childish crap used to upset me, but I grew up and wised up very much in the past year.   I found out want is really important in life.  Family, REAL friends, and things that give you joy are important everything else can fall by the way side and I will not miss it.   In the past year I have figured out who my real friends both on and off the net are and I would do just about anything for them.   Those who have nothing in their lives but drama, hate, and loneleness that causes them to seek attention any way they can get it even if it is negative attention are of no concern to me anymore.   I am more then happy to punch those that seek to make me unhappy a ticket on the iggy train.    Know what that ignore button is the best thing they ever created for the internet.   You click on their name and click ignore and POOF they are gone you see nothing the say ever again.   Wouldn't it be great if someone would invent one of those that would work in the real world?   n34.gif  Think about it if your neighbor plays their music too loud you click ignore and you do not hear it.   If someone is throwing a bunch of cuss words around  click and they shut up.   Can you imadgin how much quieter and relaxed the world would be if you could just click ignore on anyone or anything that bothered you?   I know some people what are always upset because other people are apparently talking about them behind their backs.   If they clicked ignore on those telling it to them they would never know it and it would not stress them out.   I reallllly wish people would take a lesson from that childrens game where one person whispers something to another and they tell it to the next person and it goes all the way down a line  then the last person says what was told to them outloud and it is nearly never the same as the first thing that was said.   The moral is the more people that repeat something the more twisted it gets.  I know exactly why it happens.   The majority of people do not repeat what was said to them they repeat what they THOUGHT the person speaking meant.   The fact of the matter is very few people mean what the person they are talking to thinks they do.   That is why I tell everyone YOU CAN REPEAT ANYTHING I  SAY BUT YOU DAMN WELL BETTER REPEAT IT THE WAY I SAID IT NOT THE WAY YOU THOUGHT I MEANT IT.   I will stand behind anything I ACTUALLY say but no way am I taking the blame for what someone else read into what I said.   My brother and I had that very discussion one time.   He was mad at our sister and our neice because of a question they asked him about his daughter.   The actual question was a fair and pertanate one but my brother read into it and twisted it into something that was not even close to the real question.    He then quoted his read in to me.    When he did I knew something was wrong there and I said imediatly WOOOOOOOOO  WHO SAID THAT?   He said well no one actually said those words.   To that I said WAIT IF NO ONE SAID THOSE WORDS WHY ARE YOU SAYING THAT?    He then tried to justify himself by saying well you know what people mean when they say something.   I said not all the time.   He then continued well if I told you if you go outside you are going to get wet you would know it is raining right?   I said NOT NECCESSACERALLY.   I said there could be someone outside with a water hose spraying everyone that came out the door.    I would get wet but it would not be raining.   So he changed it and said if I tell you it is raining outside you will know if you go out you will get wet right?   I said NOT NECCESSACERALLY if I went out on a porch with a roof on it I could go outside and maybe not get wet even if it were raining.   I then followed up with when no one said what you said but you quoted that it must be YOU WHO THOUGHT IT ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER.   He shut up about it then.    
     I am a very litteral person if I say something DO NOT READ ANYTHING INTO IT.   I say exactly what I mean and anything other then my exact words that you may think I meant will be wrong.   I never imply anything.  So if you want to quote me feel free to do so BUT QUOTE ME THE WAY I SAY IT WORD FOR WORD NO EDITING NO READING INTO ANYTHING.   Ok I guess I have vented long enough lol.


WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS

     When it rains it pours in more then one way.   My brother had to go back to the hospital for more surgery Monday, and my other brother tipped his tractor and trailer over the same day.  For a short time I had both my brothers at hospitals Monday.   Lousy luck right?  As if that was not bad enough it is supposed to rain for like a week here, and it is going to get down to 34 this weekend so we could have snow.  

     Idk first things are looking good and then suddenly the bottom falls out.   Idk sometimes I think the good lord is testing me.   I wish I knew why my hands hurt so bad.


MY BROTHER IS HOME

     My brother is home now.  My sister stopped to see him the other day she says he looks good. n0.gif.     I hate to think of that sad day when I start losing my brothers and my sisters, but I know it is closer then I would like, so I am going to do the only thing I can.   I am going to enjoy them while they are here and try not to fight with them.   If I make a lot of good memories now maybe I will have something to hold onto when they are gone.  I think a lot about death these days.   The other day I was browsing tombstones  for me.   I have thought about buying my stone myself while I am alive others have, but I would hate to go to my family plot and see my grave stone there when I was not.  Several of my relatives put their stones up before they died but I really do not want to do that.   The mere fact I was looking tells me I may be coming to grips with the fact we all die.   I like to tell people if I live to be 100 and am remembered 50 years after my death I will think I had a good life.  

    I am not looking for immortality.    I think it was put best on a TV show I watched one time an immortal character said about what torture it was to watch everyone you ever knew and loved grow old and die around you and you had to go on without them.   I AGREE my family and I may not always see eye to eye but I am not sure I would want to go on if they were all gone.   We just buried my last living uncle this past summer.   Now I have no aunts or uncles left.   He was luckier then me he had his kids (well they are all over age 50 now) to be with him.   I have no children.   I want to think my niece will be there for me when I am old, but there is no guarantee he has her own family and her own life and her own parents.   I think some day I may die a lonely old woman.  BUT THOSE WORRIES ARE FOR THE FUTURE TIME.

     Right now I still have all my brothers and sisters one brother in law and 2 sisters in law along with 6 nieces and nephews and 10 great nieces and nephews.   I also have a few very special friends.   One of my friends was so kind to me that she stayed with me the whole time I was in the hospital the first time in October.   Her husband runs errors for me and will not take any money for doing it.  Their youngest daughter is so much like me in personality she could have been my daughter. lol We were out together one time my neighbor her daughter and me and someone thought I was my neighbors mother. lol We laughed.   Friends like this are rare and hard to find and if you do find them you should treat them like the great treasure they are.


ISN'T IT HARD ENOUGH

     Isn't it hard enough when you are disabled to get along in the world?   What I hate most is people that play on their disabilities to get everything their way.   FIRST LET ME MAKE IT CLEAR I AM IN NO WAY SAYING ALL DISABLED PEOPLE DO THIS.   This is aimed at the minority and you know who you are who use your disability to manipulate people into doing what you want of giving you what.   Somewhere along the ling these people have decided that  being disabled may not be all bad.    They have realized people would feel sorry for them and want to make things easier for the disabled person.  

     I have a friend who has a legit disability, but somewhere he has learned to use it to get people to do what he wants them to, and I will admit it used to work on me too.   After knowing him for many years I am getting to where I can tell if he is really hurting or if he is just playing it to get what he wants.    It is starting to bug me because he has developed a sense of entitlement.   He thinks he should have everything he wants and everyone should do what ever he asks because he is disabled.   He thinks he should be allowed to do things others are not.  

     He spent 20 min telling us a story about a retirement party at work.   Apparently this girl was leaving and several of her coworkers were giving her hugs.   EVENTHOUGH HE HAD BEEN TOLD BY HER BEFORE TO RESPECT HER PERSONAL SPACE he took it upon himself to hug her because everyone else was doing it and he though he should be allowed to also.   When she took exception to him touching her after being told not to in the past he had the nerve to say she was a bitch.   I do not think someone is a bitch because they want to pick who touches their body.   I told him she has the right to choose who touches her, but he did not understand that his disability does not give him any special rights to touch another person if they do not want it.

     Later the same night he got someone else to run a tournament for him by saying his throat hurt.   I find it interesting his throat was not hurting when he was running his mouth about that girl at work.   The ironic thing about him getting someone else to run his tourney is that just minutes before he had made a disrespectful smart ass remark about the very td that ran his tourney for him.   She thought he was not feeling well and wanted to help him.   I tried to tell her he was manipulating her, but she did not want to believe it.   His sense of entitlement made him think he could talk any way he wanted about anyone he wants and they still have to do what he wants them to do.   It is the few people like this that make it harder on all the other disabled people.

     I myself have a disability that I wish I never did.   It stole decades of my life and kept me from enjoying my youth.   I had an aunt that had became so jaded by seeing people working their disabilities that she actually said to me one time " You like setting at home collecting your freebees."  To which I answered I would trade your ability to go where ever you want when ever you want for my so called freebees any day.   She had no clue how hard I tried to get better and how much it hurt when I failed.  I blame those that have the sense of entitlement like the world owes them something for attitudes such as hers.

     I wish I could go back in time knowing what I know now.  Maybe just maybe I would not have lost as much of my life as I did.   There are a few things had I done them different may have helped me with my condition.   It is true what they say about hindsight being 20/20.


MORE GOOD NEWS

   They say they got all my brothers cancer and they are going to start his reconstructive surgery tomorrow.   Thank All of you that kept him in your prayers.  If all goes well he will make a full recovery.   I told a friend of mine one day my family is hard to kill.   Several of us have had close calls over the past year but we are all still here.   My mom used to say the good lord looks after babies and fools.   Well considering most of us are well over 18.  I guess that puts us in the latter category. lol   I just know someone up there has been looking out for us. I would like to thank our guardian angles too for making sure we all get well even when it looks bad.