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      I think it was best said in the Christmas movie IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE.  Clarence said to George, "Each man's life touches so many others that when he is not there it leaves a big hole.   Have any of you ever thought how different the people in your live lives would be if you were  not there?   For instance in my own life,  a little girl named Sandy would not be alive today because when I was 13 I pulled her off the road as a car speeded at her.   That is just one small place where I know I  made a difference in someone else's life.   What about the differences I made that I do not know about.   I used to help children with their school work for many years.   I would take them on walks and if they were good I would buy them treats.   Occasionally one of those children will stop by to see me all grown up, and they still remember me.   One young man who I had helped when he was young told his nieces that they should always listen to me, because I was a good person and I used to do things with him when he was a child.   There is no better feeling then knowing you made a difference in someone's life.

    I would like to take a minute to let someone know he made a difference in mine.   A little over a year ago I was a mess emotionally. A friend of mine took me in and kept me close to him and his friends till I was able to heal my shattered heart.   It appears he may soon be going on in search of things that will make him happy, but I could not let him go without letting him know how much he means to us all.

     I am never good with separating from people I have held dear in my heart and it appears this year I may have 2 such separations.    When you have done everything you can do to keep those you love close to you and still it does not work the only thing you can do is let them go.   If they are really yours they will come back to you in time.   If they do not come back someday you will be able to forget the pain of their loss and only remember the joy they have brought into your life.

HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER HEARD OF THE KEYSTONE?    DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS AND WHY IT IS IMPORTANT? 

    The keystone is the top center stone of and arch  and without that stone the whole arch would cave in.   It needs that keystone to hold the arch upright, strong and stable.   Without the keystone firmly in place the arch will collapse into just a pile of rocks.   Every strong structure has a keystone that holds it up strong and steady.   Should that keystone be removed the door into the building will collapse.

     In many ways some people are like keystones.   They hold together groups or organizations and if they are removed for what ever reason the group will fold.   We had a residents council in my neighborhood it was ran by a woman named Debbie Ermlick.   She was a very strong and driven woman, someone which everyone looked up to.   Her will was so strong her drive so straight whatever she wanted she would make happen.  She was the keystone of the residents council.   When the day came that Debbie walked away from the council, it collapsed in less them a year.   Those that took it over did not have what it took to keep it going.       

     I have seen this happen many times in many ways.   When that one person that has made an organization great walks away from it the organization does not last long.   Soon everything they key person had worked so hard for is laying in rubble.     Many do not realize their value till it is too late.   They do not realize what they meant to others, and how others leaned on them when they were not strong.   

     Lately I have been thinking a lot about friends.    What makes 2 people friends and what causes friends to part.   I have lost many friends over my life.   Some moved away or I moved  away from them.   I had a couple that died wayyyyy too young.   Sometimes there are big fights, and other times we just drift apart.   I have lost a couple friends to pure stubbornness both on my part and theirs.   What I hate most is the friends I have lost without closure, the ones that refuse to talk things out or even tell me what I really did.   I had a friend in high school I lost that way.   She just turned on me for no reason.

     It is like the old saying:   People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed or just felt. They have come to assist you through a hard time, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. Then, suddenly, the person disappears from your life. Your need has been met; their work is done.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share or grow or give back. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They give you great joy. Believe it; it is real. But only for a season.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons—things you must build upon to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all your other relationships.

Think about the people in your life over the years. Whether they were there for a reason, a season or a lifetime, accept them and treasure them for however long they were meant to be part of your life.   And when they are gone, be thankful for the gifts you received from them when they were here—for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

     I have many people who come into my life for reasons and seasons, but it hurts me when they part from me because I would wish all my friends be lifetimes friends.   Unfortunately most people do not have the patience, tolerance, and understanding it takes to be a lifetime friend with me.   Many think they can change me to suit their needs.   When it does not work they become angry and leave.   I have only found 1 person that has the patience understanding and tolerance to be my lifetime friend.   Her name is Cindy.   We met in first grade and have been friends ever sense.   Cindy knows all about me the good the bad and the unreasonable and she has always stood by my side.   There were times in school that it was just her and me.   We were not the pretty kids.   We were not the popular kids. We were not the smart kids, but we had something none of them had.   We had a friend that loved us and allowed up to be who we are without questioning or condemning it.   That is what makes her my lifetime friend.

     Some of you may know  several months ago I lost one of my favorite socks.   It was driving me nuts because I know for a fact I put it in the washer, but I could not find it after that.   I checked inside my clothes I washed with it.   I looked around the washer and dryer and around my bed.   I moved the washer and dryer.  I even took the agitator off and looked under it.  The sock was no ware to be found.   It was bugging me really bad that it was gone and I had no clue what happened to it.   My mom had bought those socks and my mom is no longer with us, so I really did not want to loose it.  

     After many months of wondering what happened to it, it reappeared this morning.  I had went to the kitchen and on my way back I found it laying on a rug that was not even on the floor when the sock came up missing.   Apparently it disappeared after it had went through the dryer, because it was all clean and fresh.   The only thing I can come up with is I must have missed and outfit when I searched them to see if the sock was stuck in any sleeves or pant legs.   I have another blouse identical to the one I have on today.  I am thinking somehow it got stuck in this outfit and I did not realize I had not checked it because I checked the other one thinking it was the one that had been in the wash with the sock.   If that is not what happened I have no idea where it could have been all these months.   I was pretty happy for about 20 min.   I called my sister to tell her I found it, and she told me our cousin had died.   He had been ill for some time and they did a cardiac cap on him and found he had blockages.  Just a day later he was dead.   I really think they should check closer the side effects of  cardiac catheterization.   I had it done 2 times a short time later I had afb both times.  Now my cousin has it and he dies a short time later.   I think we need to look deeper into the side effects of it.

   Did you ever notice that when you see your own personality traits emerge in someone else they will bug you?   I have a tendency to rub people wrong without even trying.   Part of the reason I bug people is my undying kneed to prove I am right when I feel I am.  I do not deny this trait.   It is part of my post traumatic stress disorder. I know I do it most times without realizing it till I make someone mad, and I own it, it is part of me there is nothing I can do about that.  My real friends get used to it and still stay my friends.   Those that do not understand why I act this way do not get used to it and move on to friends who do not stand up to them or voice their opinion strongly when they are right.    The thing that is annoying is when  I run up against someone who is just as stubborn as me.   But what is 100 times more annoying then someone that argues they are right when I think I am is someone that says what they want to say and then leaves or hangs up the phone before I can say what I want to say.   I listened to them I think they should listen to me.   Which is not to say I myself have never hung up on a call because I have definitely done that also.   Usually when I do it I do it to keep from cussing someone out because they have pushed me nearly to my breaking point.   I do not walk out on someone just because they have a different opinion then mine, or if they wish to debate something.   Frankly I love a good debate.  The thing is to debate it not to get mad and argue about it.   Louder does not make one righter, even though some think it does.  

     What drives me nuts is when someone who usually deals with me fine has an emotional outburst over something I do not think is a big thing.  I know only too well sometimes people have bad days and when they do it does not take much to push them over the edge.   Hell after the year I have had I should be the poster child for bad days.   For the year 4 close relatives dead, 3 in a short time, 2 with little funeral funds.  My one sister had a small stroke and the other one had pancreatitis.  I have not just had a bad day I have had a bad year, but I am hoping next year will be better because this one was a real downer.   I had really thought this year was going to be a good one because the last couple months in last year were starting to look better, but I was wrong this year hit a downward  spin and stayed there.   Only recently am I starting to get some of my emotions back on track.  I am hoping next year will be better.   Did I mention this year was a locust (cicada) year here.   Kind of ironic my older brother was born in a locust year and he died in a locust year.   Of Corse my family does things like that my grandpa died on his own birthday.   My other grandpa died on Christmas morning.  My dad died exactly one week before Thanksgiving 1982.   My mom was buried on the birthday of my niece who was named for her.  I do not know what is with my family and dying on and around special events, but I digress.

     I do not know why it is so annoying to see our own traits in others but it is sometimes.