They're not! At least, not unless you're the only one doing so. Something I wish I'd known when I was younger . Also Truisms about the rocky road of romance: "go slow means "go away." "I need more time" has an unwritten corollary: "To find someone else." "It's not you, it's me" -- it's you all right. And the most useful tip of all: If someone ever tells you they're not good enough for you, LISTEN: it may be the only unvarnished truth you'll ever hear from 'em!